After a shower you run soaking wet and naked through your house chasing your towel which is being used as a cape.
You win 'hide and seek' by following the trail of sanitary towels stuck to the walls.
In the bottom of your coffee you find 6p in pennies and a Lego fireman.
You would really enjoy that lie in if it wasn't for the little finger up your nose.
You watch WWF wrestling to pick up tips for the next time you have to brush their teeth.
You question the spelling of your child's name as you have shouted it so many times it has started to sound wrong.
You swapped your handbag for a pocket on a Peppa Pig backpack.
The comfort toy is so 'loved' it looks like something the cat threw up.
You greet visitors with a glass of water and a couple of Nurofen.
Guests are greeted by your child by each being handed a pair of your worn knickers from the wash basket.
You freak out when the red spots don't disappear when you run a glass over them, then realise it's okay, it's just ketchup.
You smell burning ... You spend half an hour extracting cremated Pom Bears from inside the radiator with a pair of tweezers.
You find a pool of juice on the kitchen floor ... or is it juice?
You do the smell test.
You realise you just dipped your nose in pee.
You wonder what they are doing in the kitchen ... and then your washing machine turns on ... with nothing in it.
You forget you are shopping on your own and make car noises with the trolley.
For more 'You know you have a toddler when...' see Part 1 here.